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AQ's Solo Writing

Psychedelic Therapy 2

Ketamine (anesthetic) medicine

[Ketamine] The Radiant Infusion/Anesthesia Sessions

September 2023

Contents

Introduction

Infusion Session 1

Infusion Session 2

Infusion Session 3

Infusion Session 4

Infusion Session 5

Infusion Session 6

Final Thoughts

Ketamine infusion treatment

Introduction

At first, I didn’t know much about IV ketamine infusion, other than being another therapeutic method to help treat and alleviate anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and other mental health issues. Thanks to the Bay Area Ketamine Center in Los Altos, California, I was put up to speed with treatment and protocols after a few phone discussions. Although Ketamine isn’t a plant-based medicine like psilocybin (magic mushrooms), ayahuasca (DMT), and mescaline (peyote), the infusion (anesthesia) produces similar effects to MDMA (ecstasy), to some extent.

Since the infusion treatment is through an IV, consisting of a clear plastic tube inserted in an arm vein, it produces faster antidepressant effects compared to swallowing a pill. In a nutshell, the IV ketamine infusion penetrates by repairing the synapses, the part of the brain where info flows. It’s like using anesthesia to flush out toxic information that has accumulated and stuck in our brains for a long time.

As someone who’s dealt with on-and-off bouts of depression for two years (since 2021), I came to the point where alternative/psychedelic therapy was worth experimenting with for the short-term. Traditional therapy of partnering up with licensed therapists has its advantages and is worth it, but for me, there’s a missing link for my mental health. When we hit a plateau, it’s time to test something new. 

 

In this article, we’ll take a ride on my IV ketamine infusion treatment in August and September 2023, involving six psychedelic sessions that take us to different dimensions.

Infusion Session 1

I feel glued to my chair after a few minutes of ketamine infusion through an IV in my right arm vein. 

My eyes get heavier. The wall has neon-green laser lights, resembling mini stars, flashing slowly. I want to take out a pen and notebook and write, but I’m too sedated on ketamine, unable to move.  

 

The neon-green laser lights transform into a galaxy, with me being close enough to touch the bright stars. My smile widens and freezes.

 

This new dimension has soothing waves of neon-pink and neon-purple. They fall in front of me as if I have a ringside seat to Alaska’s Northern Lights (Aurora Borealis).

 

The ego and personality don’t exist in this domain. I’m dissociated from the past, present, and future. 

I smile again, reaching another dimension, and feeling happier. A simple pink and blue digital circuit board comes in front of me, going in slow motion downward, allowing me to view the beautiful details of the structure.

 

My heart and stomach expand as inhalations and exhalations flow deeply and effortlessly through my nose. I feel the power within me.

 

The Reiki playlist by Deuter (Koyasan: Reiki Sound Healing album) amplifies the psychedelic experience and internal healing. The incredible imagery and colors unfolding are breathtaking. 

 

I’m far beyond the moon, feeling hopeful, optimistic, and creative. 

 

Meanwhile, as the ketamine infusion flows through my cells, my heart rate, oxygen level, and blood pressure are closely monitored by the nurse and licensed doctor in another room, which adds a layer of peace of mind.

 

I slowly and calmly come out of the trance after the first 40-minute session. I feel disoriented leaving the treatment center. I’m grateful that they require every patient to either get a ride home from a family member, friend, or an Uber or Lyft driver. Besides, even if I wanted to drive home, I couldn’t get behind the wheel right now. 

Ketamine infusion therapy

Infusion Session 2

Round two is about to begin with a 20 percent increase in ketamine compared to session one, which was 48 hours ago. 

 

As I listen to the Reiki playlist provided by the clinic, I get into drowsiness and grounded mode. With the lights off, curtains closed, and the wall in front of me covered with neon star lights, the room pivots to a black galaxy with green stars. This floating-in-space sensation feels wonderful. 

 

My smile turns into a loud chuckle even though nothing funny has popped up in my altered state of mind.

 

I enter the Northern Lights again, as I did two days ago during ketamine infusion session one. The light neon-pink and neon-blue color waves drift perfectly from above, generating calmness in my body.
 

A green circuit board crosses me slowly and diagonally from left to right. It’s so close to my face that I can touch it.

 

This new dimension is dark, mainly black and some dark-gray colors. The Himalayan rock lamp on the left side of the room shoots a light-orange ray going upward, through the corner of my left eye. 

 

Thoughtless and dark, two gray bars form above my eyes, descending and pushing my body, causing it to sink deeper into this recliner chair. 

 

I slowly return to the room, an indicator that the 40-minute ketamine infusion session is complete, regardless that I’m somewhat numb from the anesthesia. The relaxation and stillness of this session was profound.

Ketamine infusions

Infusion Session 3

Room three has a different feel, radiating positive vibes, or maybe it’s the recent vibrational frequency shift since I started this treatment program four days ago–or all the above.

 

The doctor increases my dosage by 15 percent, totaling 100 percent ketamine for the 40-minute infusion session.

 

The straight and wavy light neon-pink, neon-purple, and neon-blue waves, flowing like a glass mirror, put me at ease.

 

This dimension transitions into dark-brown and gray colors moving from left to right, shifting me to deeper relaxation. I smile and chuckle happily. 

 

The dimension darkens to pitch black. I’m isolated with nothing in mind, trying not to fear the unknown. Instead, I reiterate “inhale” and “exhale,” sparking a meditative state. 

 

Now I’m floating and flying sideways like I’m on a spaceship in this unknown and shadowy domain.

 

Two light-orange beams appear, symbolizing the letter I, buzzing close to my pupils. The word “compassion” crosses my mind, followed by “we’re all sensitive people; we were all innocent kids before; we’re all interdependent to one another.” 

An intense cooling sensation passes through my body, activating the soul to have more empathy toward people. My eyes feel somewhat watery as the violin and flute play harmoniously in the Reiki song.

 

I want to chuckle loudly or laugh, regardless that my sedation is at the motionless level.

 

The artificial tree a few feet away from me slowly elevates a few feet off the floor, causing my eyes to widen.

 

I return to reality: the four-cornered patient room. What a peaceful and slightly emotional therapy session.

IV ketamine

Infusion Session 4

Today’s the final IV ketamine infusion session. The treatment plan is four to six infusions within a two to three week window. Session four is considered the sweet spot. 

 

I lay back on the recliner chair with my head facing the ceiling instead of sitting upright as I did in sessions one to three.
 
The Reiki music by Dueter gets me lost, preventing thoughts from surfacing.
 
The lethargy from the anesthesia pushes me to a matrix-like dimension, with bright white and gray pebbles attached to a green mirror moving gently.

 

My eyes close, sinking further into a dark galaxy full of neon-green stars that enlarge after every blink of an eye. A large black eye with no eyelashes, the size of a clock, appears in the galaxy and is looking straight at me.

 

The galaxy stars and jumbo eyeball evaporate, making the atmosphere black. White and orange laser beams shoot from top to bottom, stretching like two rubber bands.

Now black and white bubbles develop. It appears to be a distorted yin-yang sign. My senses heighten because I’m intrigued by the bubbly formation.

 

I enter a new dimension containing a huge white cell in a smoke-color background. I’m inside the oily cell, moving slowly in water with other bubbly organisms. A question pops up: “Is this me when I first formed inside my mother’s womb?”

 

Cool air flows through my veins while black, white, and gray shadows vibrate.

 

Vibrating shadows move in a circular and sluggish motion. My brain feels like it’s repairing by flushing out years and decades of venomous thoughts and beliefs stored inside my subconscious.

 

The session concludes with my left hand on my forehead, covering my eyes, overwhelmed by the mystical dimensions that were unveiled moments ago. 

 

Ketamine infusion session four was the sweet spot for me. It wasn’t hype by the doctors and nurses or a sales tactic to keep patients coming back for more after the first session. The Google reviews weren’t lying either.

Ketemine infusion for depression

Infusion Session 5

The doctor increases my ketamine infusion dosage. This is unexpected; I thought I hit the sweet spot during infusion session four a month ago. Still, I have no expectations on what I’ll encounter in the next 40 minutes while ketamine flows through my body.

 

The ketamine is hitting me hard, triggering my body to sedation. My thoughts have evaporated.

 

A dark galaxy covered with neon-green stars enlarge and brighten as they come closer to my body and face in slow motion. I continue floating upward into the galaxy and luminescent stars, while lying on my back. There’s no solar system or planets. I’m beyond outer space in another peaceful galaxy where anger, anxiety, fear, and doubt don’t exist.

 

This new dimension has large dark circles swirling uncontrollably. The Reiki music from the playlist stops abruptly. The circulating dark circles form into a black hole, producing mental turbulence. It feels like someone is grabbing my head, shaking it with their hands. I stop focusing on my breath. Perhaps the vibrating spins inside the black hole are left over toxic residue releasing from my brain and getting sucked inside. 

 

Another dimension forms to a neon-pink and neon-purple galaxy with a bunch of neon-green stars. The stars tremble powerfully, changing from neon-green to blurry smoke shadows.

 

Neon-blue and neon-green water waves resembling long, thin snakes from above the sky flow in synchrony. My body feels fluid like H2O. The water waves change to neon pink and neon purple, rapidly moving downstream. I can’t believe this!

The sky turns into a charcoal-colored, smoky atmosphere, and the word “Forgiveness” manifests in my mind. There are no people, places, and things associated with the noun. 

 

I realize I’m present again, inside this small patient room with no more dimensions. What a one-of-a-kind intergalactic experience.

Ketamine infusions

Infusion Session 6

This is my last IV ketamine infusion session. It’s a 15% increase from the previous visit (infusion session five) three days ago. Whatever happens, happens. Besides, this isn’t my first rodeo with ketamine infusions. The doctor and nurse will monitor my vitals in another room, and they can pull the plug if I have a bad trip. 

The ceiling light is off while the ketamine flows quickly into my right arm vein through a plastic tube. I feel glued to the fully reclined chair with my face and body aimed toward the ceiling. 

 

Everything, including the Deuter (Reiki music) playlist, is moving slowly, forcing me to be in a sloth mode. Nudging sensations rattle my vision, making the bright neon stars in the black galaxy blurry and frozen. 

 

The black galaxy turns to a dark green transparent matrix as the neon-green stars brighten and float vertically, gradually zooming into my face, enabling me to see the details in amazement.

 

Feelings of love and happiness stimulate my psyche and make me smile. A chuckle bursts from my mouth, while my serotonin heightens.

 

The charcoal sky switches to a universe of beautiful light neon colors. The neon-blue and neon-green thin tornadoes swirling vertically have hypnotized me. My eyes widen as the tornadoes change to light neon purple and neon pink to light orange swirls. I have a front row seat to another dimension beyond Alaska’s Northern Lights. The harmless tornadoes spinning perfectly remind me to go with the flow rather than trying to connect the dots of life.

 

A voice in my head says, “Peace, love, respect.” It reiterates the words: “peace, love, respect; peace, love, respect.” I feel joyful and open to whatever comes my way. 

 

A “Let go” whisper forces me to stop concentrating on what’s in front of me. I hear “Let go” again, but this time, I clearly detect it as my inner voice, not the music from the headphones. “Go with the flow” and “You’ve got this” follow. Maybe my inner coach is reminding me to practice compassion with myself.

 

The nurse comes in and unplugs the IV, symbolizing that the 40-minute ketamine infusion is complete, and the 20-minute cool down session begins. 

 

I’m baffled by the intense moments of happiness I experienced. This patient room isn’t just a four-cornered room. There are other dimensions that exist beyond my imagination, thanks to ketamine and therapeutic intentions. Now I understand why the Bay Area Ketamine Center recommends following the six infusions/sessions protocol.

IV Ketamine infusions

Final Thoughts

Ketamine infusion has improved my mental health. It feels like some toxic residue was scrubbed from my brain. Negative emotions, including anger, anxiety, fear, and doubt have lowered. I have a let-bygones-be-bygones attitude toward people, places, and things. Maybe it’s the letting go process in my personal development quest. Starting relationships and memories with a clean slate is doable, but sometimes, letting go is better than trying to salvage or rekindle something, especially if it’s not helping you become a better version of yourself.

 

The six infusions from August through September 2023 have been the Amazon Prime for my mental health in comparison to traditional therapy, working with different licensed therapists on and off for roughly two years. I wouldn’t object to occasionally revisiting the Bay Area Ketamine Center for a booster session to either prevent mental health issues from flaring or worsening or keep me mentally stable down the road.

 

If you’ve been on the traditional therapy boat for quite some time and don’t feel that it’s working or having a significant impact, it wouldn’t hurt to look into a licensed, safe, and legitimate place like the Bay Area Ketamine Center. Ketamine therapy might be the missing piece of the puzzle for your mental health.

AQ's Solo Writing
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